How You Carry Yourself

I read an article on CNN.com the other day about just how different men's brains are from women's. They sincerely function differently than we do. One of the things men are programmed to do is to notice "fertile" looking women. I think, in modern society, the whole "fertile" thing is simply expressed as "hot" or "sexy." Anyways, here is the root of the classic "my eyes are up here" problem that large-breasted women often have. Well, it's sort-of a problem; smaller breasted women may look at those larger-breasted women with envy. I mean, we all want to be noticed and seen as sexy, right? Please note that I'm not saying that I want someone staring at my chest instead of listening to what I have to say. I'm just saying that I wouldn't mind getting noticed every once in a while.

Well, it is my opinion that those small-breasted women who envy those large-breasted women aren't being noticed because they ooze their own lack-of-confidence! If you feel bad about yourself, it shows. If you are confident and carry yourself as such, people notice. If you hold your head up and walk with the swagger you've always wished you could walk with, you are going to be one of those females that seem "fertile." And by that I mean that men will notice you because they are programmed to notice women who would be good "mates."

I don't mean to imply that I'm always able to accomplish this. It's really difficult when the media is bombarding you with images of women with big, fake boobs. I am often that girl who is not carrying herself with confidence. I hunch over and look down. But on those good days, when I'm feeling good and I maybe decide to wear one of my favorite outfits, I keep my head up and my eyes straight-ahead, and I know people notice. Despite my small breasts. Because of my small breasts. With my small breasts. Whatever it might be.

Here's a link to the article on CNN I read: http://www.cnn.com/2010/OPINION/03/23/brizendine.male.brain/index.html?iref=allsearch.

Mixed Messages

You know what drives me crazy? The fact that women are somehow expected to at once be skinny AND have big boobs. Um, excuse me? Boobs are mostly what? Oh yeah, FAT. What kind of mixed message is this? When you lose weight, you often lose some of it on top. When you gain weight, your boobs often get a little bigger. It's just the way it is. It's silly for women to expect to be able to (naturally) be slim and have large breasts. I think you have to have some kind of super-lucky genes to happen to be built that way.

I have recently lost 17 lbs (was 146 lbs in mid-October, am 129 lbs today!)... and, yep, my favorite bra is starting to fit badly. But, I would rather be slim, lean, fit, etc. and have small boobs. Seriously. Eating poorly and not exercising is not a good way to "enhance" your breasts. It's not like you'll look any better that way!

I'm just trying to convince people that the media is often full of crap, and that breasts of all sizes are beautiful and sexy. Don't let pictures of Victoria's Secret models make you feel inadequate in any way. Don't let your boobs be the reason you're afraid to get out there and get healthy. Don't feel bad about what you have!

What to wear???

Ok, I'm not much of a fashion person, but hey, I like to look good sometimes (who doesn't?). I have found it to be very difficult to find things that fit/look good on top. It's quite frustrating to try on things that literally HANG off of me, again and again. But, on occasion, I find that one PERFECT top or PERFECT dress (and I have to buy it... hey, how often do these finds occur?). I was doing some research for writing this blog today, and I kept finding sites addressing how to make your boobs look bigger with clothes. But, what I had wanted to find was what kind of clothes flatter small breasted women. There's a difference... why should I have to make my boobs look bigger than they are? I just want to show that they can look good and be a part of my overall figure (in a good way). SO, here are clothing-types that I have found to flatter my own figure. Again, I'm no expert on fashion, but I certainly do know what I like and why.

Scoop Necks:
-Many people think that small breasted women should not wear tops that have lower necklines (because they say it will only draw attention to what you DON'T have). I say that's total crap. I love to wear scoop neck shirts that come down low enough to just show a little of the perk. And yes, that's what small breasted women have that big breasted women often don't have. Why not show that off? Maybe a plunging neckline will simply show lack of cleavage, but you have to admit that high, firm breasts are something to show off on occasion.

Backless Shirts and Dresses:
-I also love backless shirts and dresses. The reason we small-topped ladies can wear these where others can't is that we don't wear a bra with them. I have this awesome red shirt that looks like a regular women's t-shirt in the front, but just has criss-crossing on the back. I love it. It surprises people, I always get compliments when I wear it, and I catch guys checking me out when I have it on. Backs are sexy too, people. It's all skin. And, I'm not gonna lie, I love to free-boob it on occasion. And I can, so why not? I think a lack of a bra will make a guy look just as often as big boobs in a bra will.

Sleeveless Shirts and Dresses:
-Women who have small breasts often have smaller frames and therefore lean arms. Sleeveless shirts and dresses look great on women with smaller frames. It's also another way to show some skin if you're not feeling confident showing off the ladies.
-Tank tops and dresses that have a little cinching around the bust also flatter small breasts.
-I've also heard that patterned tanks flatter small-breasted women, but the truth is, I prefer solids.

This represents my own opinion based on my own experiences. I'd love to read comments from people who have other opinions about what looks good!

"Nearly" Sizes!

So, right after the holidays this year, I went bra shopping. My experience was quite depressing. For the first time, Victoria's Secret let me down. I did not find ONE bra there that fit me correctly (partly because things had been picked over during their post-holidy sale). I branched out into the rest of the mall, and I started counting how many I tried on; I got up to 27 before I found one I was willing to buy. TWENTY-SEVEN! In the process, I came across a size I had never seen before: a "nearly b" (or an "almost b"). This is marked as "NB" or "AB" on the tag. The funny thing is, I believe I was in Sears when I found this (was getting desperate!). I didn't actually end up buying a NB bra, but I was still impressed to find that this size exists. No one told me!

I looked into it, and there are actually several "in-between" sizes out there (Nearly A, nearly B, nearly C). They're harder to find (the internet proves helpful, but I personally hestitate to buy a bra without trying it on). From my experience at the mall, some of the cheaper department store brands carry those off sizes. I have never seen an in-between size at a Victoria's Secret store, and, after checking their website, it seems they don't carry them at all. One thing Vickie's does do is provide a complimentary sizing to customers. It might be helpful, as many women are not wearing the correct bra size.

Playtex pioneered these in-between sizes with their "Thank Goodness it Fits" line. They can be found online at many department stores.

Do not despair! It may take some time to find, but your size is out there somewhere!

Dispelling a Myth

Hey all,

Sorry this post is late; I was out of town this weekend!

I'd like to talk a little about the myth that people with small breasts are less likely to get breast cancer. THIS IS ABSOLUTELY FALSE and should never influence whether or not you get a lump checked or whether you do monthly self-exams. In fact, men can and do get breast cancer too.

There are advantages and disadvantages to having small breasts when it comes to breast cancer detection. An advantage is that it is much easier to self-detect; lumps are VERY easy to feel. A disadvantage is that there is not as much tissue to compress for a mammogram (which is uncomfortable). Doctors claim that people with breasts of any size can get mammograms. One thing about small breasts that makes mammograms harder is that less of the breast tissue is fat. It is easier to find abnormalities behind fat than it is behind denser breast tissue. For this reason, self-exams are crucial! Check out this FAQ site called Imaginis... they have a section specifically answering questions about small breasts and mammograms: http://www.imaginis.com/breasthealth/mammography_small_breasts.asp.

My mother is a two-time breast cancer survivor. She had to have chemotherapy, radiation, and ultimately two mastectomies. As her daughter, I am automatically put in a high-risk class for getting cancer myself. I found a lump the summer of 2008 using self-detection(immediately freaked out and thought I was going to die). I went to my doctor, she found what was concering me, told me what she thought it was (a fibraednoma... hard tissue build-up, NOT malignant). I went to the Breast Care Center at UVA hospital and had it removed (just wanted the damn thing out of me). I now have a huge scar on my right breast as a daily reminder of the whole experience, and as a reminder to keep checking myself. I thought the scar was ugly and awful at first, but now I've gotten used to it and see it as unique. It's such a small scar compared to my mother's many.

I would like to stress that women OF ALL AGES should be checking themselves on a montly basis. It's not hard; you can find directions and pamphlets in any doctor's office or online: http://www.breastcancer.org/symptoms/testing/types/self_exam/bse_steps.jsp?gclid=CK6Uheur-p8CFRIeDQodcgH8Vw.

Also, if you have a history of breast cancer in your family like I do, be sure to get your gyno or other doctor to perform a thorough exam on you once a year. It's not fun, but it's so worth the peace-of-mind.

Hello there all you "Almost B's!"

Hello, I'm Ryan (FEMALE Ryan! My name always throws people off!) and I'm somewhere between an A and a B-cup depending on the day and the brand of bra I'm wearing. My small "rack" has been the source of some self-image issues for me and has also been a royal pain in the ass when it comes to bra, bathing suit, and clothes shopping. This blog is for all the women out there who have dealt with these issues too.

Because so many people base their self-image on the looks of celebrities and models, I wanted to list some famous, small-breasted women. Kate Hudson is one (see pic). I think most people would agree that she is gorgeous, and that her small breasts do not detract from her beauty in any way. Others are Debra Messing (from "Will and Grace"), Alexis Bledel ("Gilmore Girls" and "The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants"), Kniera Knightly ("Pirates of the Caribbean"), Calista Flockhart (Ally McBeal), Audrey Hepburn (Breakfast at Tiffany's), and Juliette Binoche ("Chocolat"). It's so refreshing that these women haven't felt the need get plastic surgery in spite of the fact that they spend their lives in front of other people. Obviously, not everyone thinks that small boobs are bad or ugly. I've also noticed that a lot of models are small-breasted (perhaps because they have nary an ounce of fat on them, but still).

Hopefully that helps you feel a little more confident in your Almost-B's, or A's, or whatever you happen to have. I will be writing weekly on a new topic centering on small boobs.